Thursday, February 8, 2018

Managing Stress

When you think about stress, you always think it is something negative but actually, it can be a positive thing too. Stress isn't necessarily bad. It can be good too if it is in small doses because it can sometimes push you to perform better or even motivate you to do your best.

For me, I work better under pressure. I hate it but I just work and perform better when I am pushed. Or rather, when I have no way out, I will be the best version of myself. Strange isn't it? Well, we are all different and some are just built differently. I am one of them weirdos if you like to call it that!

Having said that, I HATE stress! Little or a lot, I just hate it. I dont care if I am a better product from being stressed, I just hate being stressed out. I am actually very calm and contented most of the time. Stress is what I cannot control because it doesn't come from me. It comes from the people around me. That's why I try my best to pick and choose who I am with. I just dont want to burden myself with unnecessary stress. Unfortunately, sometimes, stress can come from a family member or someone closest to you too. That's when I need to pray to God to give me strength to carry on.

I was speaking to a friend the other day about expressing myself more. I feel like there is a blockage inside me that is preventing me to speak my mind. Sometimes, this gives me a lot of stress. For example, when I am unhappy with a situation, instead of voicing out my frustration, I tend to keep it inside. Why do I keep it inside instead of blurting it out? Well, I also hate confrontations. I dislike yelling of any sort, arguments,  is all a big no no to me. In the end, I will be the one suffering because it is all inside and sometimes, my kids will suffer because I let it out on them. Like when they come to me when I'm all boiled up. That stresses me out.

Here are some of the things I do to handle and manage my stress:

1. Get Connected with friends/family
My best friend is my "Go-to" person. She is the first person I will contact when I am feeling low. I am super blessed that I have her in my life and I hope that everyone has that one "Go-to" person whenever they feel down. I thank God every day of my life for my friendship with her because without her, life would be a lot harder. She doesn't have to do much….just a listener and supporter in everything I do. And not only that, when I am not stressed, she is the person I run to to laugh with. They say laughter is the best medicine and our friendship for over 20 years have been filled with that.

I am so lucky that I also have so many girlfriends whom I'm met a long the way who are super supportive and most importantly positive in every way. I tend to stay away from negativity because at my age, I just want to live in the most positive way. I'm over all the fun and games and madness. I just want my life to be positive and I am truly blessed that I have wonderful group of ladies who are super positive and such a great influence. Getting connected to them means I get to share their positivity in life. We all share the same goals and Alhamdulillah, even when I am down, they push me back up.

2. Talking to God the Almighty
I must admit that I still have a LONG way to go when it comes to being more religious and more spiritual. But each time I am down, speaking to Him calms me a lot. There's just something therapeutic about it. I need to do more. Note to self!

3. Eating Healthy
Now that I'm older, I find myself rejecting unhealthy food more than ever. For example, I used to eat McDonalds every time I feel like it but these days, the smell of it just makes me want to puke!
My kids and my husband still eat it whenever they want but I seldom join in. I will be there with them but the smell of McDonalds just makes me go all yuck! I hope someday they will reject it like I do but somehow I dont see that happening anytime soon.

I am also not into vegetables and fruits all that much. I am more a carbs person. But lately, I crave for vege and I juice a lot more than I normally would. I think I am organically moving towards that healthy lifestyle because of the people I am surrounded with. They eat health and so I want to eat healthy too. Which is a good thing. I feel like when my body and mind is healthy, I won't get stressed out unnecessarily.

4. Be alone
I also like to be alone when I'm stressed. Be it at home, in a cafe, I just like to be alone to gather my thoughts. Sometimes when I am stressed out, I will just lock myself in the bathroom. My kids will be outside screaming most of the time but when I am in the bathroom and they know I want to be alone, they will leave me alone! Cry it out if you must. I do that too. In the bathroom is where I cry. Once I am done crying, I look at myself in the mirror to snap out of it. I talk to myself. "Get over it!!" "You can do this!" "You will be OK". It is hard because sometimes it is not even you. It could be PMS. Normal things that dont bother you might just do when it is that wrong time of the month.

Sometimes all you need after a long day is just alone time in the bathtub. ALONE!!!! I will add a few drops of my essential oils (my favourite for bath time is Stress away, lavender and Peppermint).

5. Go Shopping or Put on Makeup
This is so bad! I do this when I'm stressed out but I do it from home. Zalora, Fashion Valet, Shopbob you name it! I will normally regret my purchases but it makes me feel so much better afterwards. I'm not encouraging compulsive buying but I think the logic behind it is you buy things that makes you feel good and to feel good, sometimes you need to look good and hence, buying clothes that may make you look better would make you feel better.

I dont go out much. I'm usually home most of the time. I obviously dont need to put on makeup whenever I'm home but sometimes, when I feel like I need a little booster, I will make an effort to put on some makeup. My husband dont like me wearing a lot of make up but when I feel down, it is all about me. I do what I want to do or need to do to bring myself up. If full on makeup it is, then full on makeup it will be. Funny how colouring your face can brighten up your day. It really does help.
But make sure you remove it well. This is how I remove mine.

So that's how I manage my stress. Tell me how do you manage yours? And tips on how to manage stress? We live in such stressful life these days. Sharing is caring. Share your tips with me.

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