Friday, July 29, 2016

Goodbye Year 1

Yesterday, my daughter officially completed her Year 1. Wow. I can't help but feel a bit emotional and proud. We survived and we did it! *pat myself on the back*

Today is school concert and I just can't wait to see her perform. She didn't go to the conventional kindy. She went to a small playschool next door and they don't have school concerts, in fact they dont have much at all.  Today, will be her first time performing in front of a large crowd. She's a performer at home. Always singing and dancing. I know she will love it tomorrow. I know I will be there with my tissues and crying my eyes out. I can feel it. I am already so damn proud that I am already tearing up as I'm typing this.

This year has been a roller coaster ride for sure. When she first started big school, it was overwhelming for her because it was her first time being away from me, physically. Before this, her school was literally next door. She knew I was just a shout away but this time, not only her school is A LOT bigger, it is further away, and it is serious business. No more playing! She was crying almost every morning for almost 3 months. Separation anxiety big time. I was crying inside too. She is popular as being the girl who cried every morning. How malufying.

Academically she's done really well too. Most of the kids her in class are a lot older than her. She is one of the youngest in her class. They are also either from reception class (where they were taught Year 1 syllabus already) or those who are not from there came from reputable schools where they were all academically ready for Year 1. My daughter wasn't. She could read and did basic maths and that was it. So to me, she's done amazingly well this year. I am proud beyond words. 

A pat on the back for me too because I've done a superb job being her tutor. She doesn't go for any additional classes except for the Singapore Maths 1 hour a week. I've tutored her for all the other subjects, including Maths and yeah, we've had our ups and downs, with the screaming, the shouting, the guilt trip, the threats and whatnot, we survived!!! It wasn't easy but I did it. I had help from the other mothers too, which was awesome. I couldn't ask for better classmates. My daughter had the best.

Next year they will all be separated according to their results. I really wish she will stay with her closest friends but I dont think they will all be together. As much as I am happy that she will be mixing with new friends and have new best friends, I can't help feeling sad. I know it is not like they won't be seeing each other again but I dont know why, I am so emotional.

I am so proud of my little girl. She is just a wonderful daughter and I dont know what I'd do without her in my life. She is just awesome. Academically, she did ok but I know she can do better. I told her not to give up and continue to do better and better next year.

Cant wait to see her perform later. I am a super proud mum. I know my husband is too. The love and joy of our lives.

Love you forever baby girl….. Year 1 has been good. Year 2, bring it on…..

Carry your own bags

I've seen this like a gazillion times before. Each time I see this, I just want to laugh. Why on earth would you want your husband / boyfriend to carry your handbag???? I don't get it!!! To me, it is totally uncool!

Sometimes I try to think and put myself in their shoes... But I can't!
The only time you will find my husband carrying my bag is when I have to fix my shoes or have to bend down and need two hands to do something. Normally, it is no longer than 5 seconds and this has happened maybe once or twice since we've been together. That's an average of once every 5 years! Basically, it is just not ON!

Today I was in Bangsar Village and I saw 2 couples and both men was carrying their girlfriend / wife's handbag. Why? Oh why?!!


It is so not cool, guys!!!!!!

If you are this person... Please explain to me why you do this?? 

Please carry your own bag. And to the men, get your woman to carry their own bag! If you want to carry their stuff for them, get a man bag. At least it doesn't look so bad! #cannottahan
Tuesday, July 26, 2016

Potty Training Madness

My son is almost 4 years old. I thought we did it but we didn't! Remember this post when I said we were 95% there? I dont know what went wrong but it feels like we are back at square 1. I am going crazy. Being maidless doesn't help too because when things get messy, I have to bloody clean it up myself. Every accidents and every "Opsss! I did it again"… It is me cleaning it all up. I am so pissed.

Recently he's been doing it again. Peeing and Pooing without telling us. I've been taking him to the toilet quite a lot even when he say he doesn't need to go but that one time when I forgot to take him, he will just happily pee in his pants.

Funny part is, his answers are always so classic. The kind of answers you want to get angry but couldn't because it is so cute.

Why did you do it??? Why didn't you tell me you need to go to the toilet???

"It came out by itself!!!"

"I didn't do it. It just came out!"

"Because you didn't ask me to go to the toilet"

"Because last time, my brother told me he got a cat" (lari topic all together) (BTW, he has imaginary brother)

I was so angry, I scolded him many times in the toilet. Until he was so scared to tell me that he wants to go to the toilet. (you can imagine that I am quite a momster). Then I decided to go on a different route. The talking and nagging route. I'm not a nagger. I just shout and scream one time and that's it. But this time, I decided to nag him. I went on and on and on one night in bed about him peeing in the toilet and not in his underwear.

"OK OK OK!!!! Me got it!!!!!!!"

and surprisingly since that night….. he has not done an accident yet. (Touch wood)

Other than nagging him that one time, I also gave him lots of "Good job!!!", "I'm so proud of you", "Look how clever you are!!!" and he's been feeling super proud of himself.

InsyaAllah, soon I hope he can be a 100% potty trained. 4 years old and still not there yet.

It's quite funny actually. Especially when you hear me nag. Even I want me to shut up.
Thank God I dont do it often. So ugly
Sunday, July 24, 2016


The best part about my blog (to me) is that it is REAL. As you can see the flow from the stories I share here, at this point in my life, I am faced with quite an annoying situation. I am MAIDLESS. Yes, this word is something I fear most because as you know, I am an undomesticated goddess. A goddess I am, yes. But an undomesticated one. I blame my mum for this. She never got me to lift a finger to do anything at home. She did it all for me. Boy, I miss living with her so much!!!

Anyway, life goes on with or without maid. Fortunately or unfortunately. But surprisingly, we are managing VERY WELL that got me thinking, perhaps, having no maid isn't such a bad thing. I mean, to have a good maid is like living in heaven but to have a bad one, is like living in hell. To have no maid? Well, you can make your home and life a heaven or hell, it is totally up to you but when you have a maid, it is not up to you how your life is because sometimes, more often than not, they bloody run the show!

Yes, I have been busier than I've ever been. Yes, I am super duper tired all the time. Yes, I am ANGRY all the time but somehow, I feel OK. (Being angry is OK? LOL)

I swear to God I could get used to having a part time maid and no full time maid. I can. I think. But my major headache at the moment now is thinking that my RM17,000 is stuck at the agency and they're not doing jackshit to expedite the process of me getting a replacement. Bad enough I'll have to pay another RM2,000 but they're not even bothered to chase for that money for now because they're already happy keeping my RM17,000! Argh. I am so angry I feel like my blood is boiling!!!

Bad enough I am eyeing this RM16,000 Dior bag and each time I think about maid, I think OMG I could have gotten this bag if we didn't spend RM17,000 on this stupid agency and stupid maid.

OK enough of bitching. I hate bitching about maid. It is such a waste of time. Actually, I am OVER my maid. I dont think about her and she's gone (she already found a new employer). I am actually done with her. Good riddance I say. But now, my bitching is purely at the agency and their lack of communication and no initiative to help despite them having a huge sum of our money with them already. They could at least give me a part time maid or send me biodatas. They can't even do that. They keep saying no biodata. WTF.

How are we surviving without maid? Well, my son is on holiday right now and is on my case every few minutes. I dont blame him. He is bored. I am not exactly a fun person to be with. I dont really know how to play. My husband is much better at keeping the kids entertained. During the day, he is all alone with me. I try to do stuff that he likes but boys are boys. He wants to jump around, he wants to kick balls, he wants to run like a maniac. I'm more chillax. I am like "come, let's watch a movie" yawn.

My daughter is really heaven sent. She's the sweetest and so very helpful. I love her to bits. She helps me set up the table for dinner. She wants to help me wash dishes too but I dont let her because she's too slow and I dont want her breaking anything. I have a part time maid come once a week so far. She's been coming for 2 weeks already and so far, it is enough. I try to do all the week's worth of laundry right before she comes in. I will then separate them, which ones are to be ironed and which ones are to be folded. Her ironing and folding isn't great. Surprisingly I think I can do better (undomesticated but I iron and fold much better than this maid) but I rather them do it than me.

My husband helps a lot too. I am so blessed and grateful that he is very hands on at home. He will help me feed one kid (or sometimes both), he will bathe them in the evening and get them ready for bed and he does all the dishes every time. I love him for helping out at home because I will die if I have to do all by myself.

Yesterday was tiring. We went out to Sunway Putra Mall to go to the "FUN Cat Show" which was the least fun cat show I've ever been to. It was so boring! We had lunch there and then came home. We came home about 2 hours before the Part Time maids came. 2 of them will come and they'll do their thing for 2.5 hours for RM100.00

I came home from the cat show and started preparing stuff for them to do. Laundry and whatnot. I also changed the linens and rainbow vacuumed our mattress. My darling daughter wanted to help so I let her help. She really did help and did a good job.

In the evening, their play area will be in a total mess. Usually when we have a maid, every few hours she will tidy the play area up. The toys will come flying again and again she will clean it up (my pinoy, not my indon) but now, I let them mess the area all day. Come 7pm, I will get both of them to clean the play area. I tell them that the play area will be "officially closed" come night time. I dont know why, but when they hear the word "official" they will quickly do it. They know that when the area is officially closed, they're not allowed in there at all. So now, by 7pm, the area will be closed and it will be neat and tidy. I must credit my daughter for this because she will be the one cleaning up. My son will be nosy and LLB (look like busy) but he's not really helping much. Most of the time he will give excuses like "this is not my toy" or "she took it out, not me" pfffft. Boys!
When she's all done cleaning, she will ask me to close my eyes and walk in the area. I will then tell her what is not right (why is this box here? why is the chair not straight? etc etc) she will fix it and then I'll give her a big hug and thank her for all the hard work. The best part is, I will ask her if her brother helped. If her answer is no, he won't get a hug. Sometimes he will cry because my daughter will get the biggest hug. Bless the sister, she will say "he helped me a bit" every time instead of saying "he didn't help at all" because if she says that, no hugs for him.


Now I know why people dont have maids. Now I know how kids are more independent without maid too. Well, we are all independent without maid. My husband would never wash dishes if we had a maid. He wouldn't do much except playing with the kids with maid around but now that we dont have one, he is the biggest helper. One time he was sweeping the floor and my daughter said "wow! papa! You look like a maid!" LOL. And not only that, one time, I was lying down and she said "oh, I thought you are kakak" I must have looked like a maid when I was lying down stealing a nap.

I am surviving. Well, we all are. It isn't all that bad. I would be happy without a full time maid and agent refund us that RM17,000 so that I can get that Dior bag. Really, I will be very very happy.

Can I have that please? Pretty please?

Thank You, IZUMIO

You may think I am being bias because I am in this business but I am not. I dont know how to explain how my life has changed since I was introduced to IZUMIO and Super Lutein. If you recall the story, it all started when my daughter kept getting a rash and I didn't know what else to do to help her. Although initially I was reluctant to get a package because it was really expensive but my gut feeling tells me that my friend won't cheat me. They're not just selling to make money, this must be good. I didn't have any health problems. I am pretty healthy (alhamdulillah) but after a year of consistently taking this product, I saw results with my own eyes. My medical report won't lie and can't lie, right? My best friend, who is a Doctor saw the results too (she did my health screening) and she is a convert. For a year I kept telling her to try but she was just not convinced. After she saw it for herself, she would be stupid not to try. Her whole family is consuming and I couldn't be happier. Not because she is now a customer, but more because her family's health is better after consuming these.

After the raya break, I dont know how but my son started getting HFMD symptoms. He had all the symptoms except for the fever. Well, being the paranoid mum that I am, I quickly diagnosed it myself and got all worried that it is HFMD. (I can be a doctor). Symptoms were very mild actually but because I am a home doctor, I still panicked. My son was not his usual annoyingly cute, hyper, active, naughty boy that he is. He was weak, he kept saying his mouth was painful, I saw spots on his palms (maybe like 3 tiny dots) and maybe like 2 tiny spots under his feet. "OMG, he's got HFMD" but my husband kept saying no. He thinks our son is just tired from all the playing and sleeping late for many nights over raya. His appetite went down because he said his mouth was painful. I couldn't find any blisters in his mouth but saw a tiny blister at the side of his tongue. Again, my husband said, maybe he just ter-bit his tongue. OK whatever it is, he was weak, some spots here and there and I was worried. I gave him IZUMIO and Super Lutein non stop. As much as he could drink. After 2 days he was back to normal.
Again, I'm not sure if it was HFMD because we didn't even got the chance to go to the Doctors. It was over so quickly. No medication was given. He recovered by just drinking lots of IZUMIO and taking lots of Super Lutein. Awesome!!!

Assuming that it was HFMD, my daughter could easily catch it from him. Luckily it was school holiday for him. I obviously dont want him spreading anything to other kids but my own daughter was at risk. I gave her IZUMIO and Super Lutein too, just to be safe. She had exams the following week and most importantly, it was few days before her birthday party. If she had same symptoms, I would have to cancel the whole party too. I kept telling her to drink IZUMIO because if she fell sick, party is over. For a partyholic like her, no way she was going to be OK with that. Alhamdulillah, she was OK.

How can I live without these wonderful products? 2 years ago if my son had fallen sick like that (felt weak, blisters and spots), we would be at the Paed's. 3 hours wait every time and at least few hundred bucks poorer. Our Paeds dont usually give medication unless it is really necessary but still, 3 hours wait is no joke! Being in the room with many sick children for 3 hours is really not healthy!

I'm not trying to be a millionaire selling IZUMIO and Super Lutein (although I know I can be from this business), but most importantly, I wish for all of you who haven't tried this to give it a go. It's not a magic potion but it does help especially if you have young kids like mine. Have a few packs ready in your first aid kit. It is just water after all…why should you be afraid of water? You drink water all the time, anyway right?

IZUMIO and Super Lutein has helped my family in a lot of ways….
- My dengue
- My kids when they have fever. This is THE BEST for fever. No more cold patch, no more paracetamol, just IZUMIO works wonders to bring the body temperature down. Dont take my word for it. TRY IT! Next time your kid has fever, please please please try this!
- Recovery from surgery. Remember my Tokmi? She recovered from her post op in 3 days. Doctor was expecting her to be admitted for at least 10 days. Amazing!
- My daughter's allergies. She had many…. I dont even remember all

Many many more…. I remember when we were in Paris and my daughter had fever a day before our scheduled Disneyland trip. Tickets all bought and she had fever. IZUMIO helped her. She did get to go to Disneyland in the end. In Istanbul, it was cold and the kids had a bit of a flu and this helped them as well. I can never travel without bringing IZUMIO along, for sure. Even if my husband didn't agree we need to bring so much, I would still bring it. You can buy clothes when you are overseas but where are you going to find IZUMIO if you need them? Better I bring it all.

What are you waiting for? Try it….
Thursday, July 21, 2016

Ramadhan 2016

I know I know….Raya is almost over and I want to talk about Ramadhan? Ya, Ramadhan went by so fast this year, I didn't even get to blog about it. I wanted to talk about it so next time I can look back and see if I've improved.

We got our new maid few days before Ramadhan. I had really high hopes. Really, I think I was expecting a miracle or something because honestly, on paper, she had it all.

-  work experience in UAE 7 years (this tells us she should know what to do and dont need much training)
- took care of children aged 2 in UAE (this tells us she will be able to look after children)
- experience working in a foreign country UAE (can speak English)
- took care of elderly in UAE (this tell us she is gentle and penyabar surely)
- single mother (no husband problems & will work hard to provide for her kids)

Bull-freaking-shit lah.

After she arrived, she was always cleaning. Washing dishes, washing this, washing that… for 48 hours after she arrived, she did just that. I didn't even see her eat. I told her to eat obviously but she didn't and I didn't see. I couldn't be bothered to check because I am just not that type. I told you to eat ….you pandai-pandai la find food or make food to eat. I'm not your chef!

So anyway….. Ramadhan came and on the night before Ramadhan, I told her to call her husband. We found out she is NOT a single mom after all. She does have a husband and he's a supir in Jakarta. OK whatever. She called him and they spoke for a bit. She was not supposed to call home yet because she already called home at the agency when she first arrived apparently. But I figured, it is malam nak puasa, let her call home to wish them or whatever. I told her what time prayers time were and Imsak and whatnot. Told her we will be up at 4am to sahur.

First puasa, she didn't wake up for sahur. I figured, maybe she doesn't know how to use the alarm clock we gave her. But it's weird because before ramadhan, she was already getting up at 6am to prepare my daughter's school stuff. OK still takpa…but for the next 30 days or so of Ramadhan, she did not wake up for sahur once!

At 4am, I am up fixing and preparing food and cooking and whatnot. My Pinoy maids, didn't even fast but they both used to wake up for sahur to prepare food for me. They both didn't cook much (my first one did but not the second maid) but they will still wake up for sahur just to be there to help, in case I needed anything. This muslim maid of mine, didn't bother. So why are we hiring muslim?????

First week of Puasa was tough because I was so tired in the morning and waking up at 4am to prepare sahur was so damn difficult. I could hardly open my eyes preparing sahur.  Slowly but surely, I got the hang of it. I got the hang of preparing sahur without maid's help with eyes closed. Not bad huh?
Who needs a maid anyway??!!!

Solat during ramadhan. Well, I must say it started off really well but then off days came and screw the pattern all together. I managed to do terawih at home after the kids went to bed a few nights. I didn't do this previous years so I guess I did improve but not enough.

My puasa went really well. Somehow I was just not that hungry. After berbuka I am just so sleepy and normally will go to bed after the kids went to bed, after isyak. My husband will go to the mosque for terawih almost every night but I will be asleep even before he comes back. He will go to bed early too.

During Ramadhan this year, I did not watch much TV at all. I just wasn't interested so now, Im back to my usual routine. I am back watching my favourite shows again.
We will go places we can order food rather than buffet type of places

This Ramadhan is a bit different from last years because for the first time ever, we did not go to any bazaar ramadhan we usually go to. We didn't explore Bangsar and TTDI bazaar ramadhan like previous years. Most of the time we will tapau food from Haslam (this malay restaurant near my house, owned by Dato Yusof Haslam, the actor) and buy lauks. A must for every puasa is otak-otak but this year, we only had it 1x and it wasn't nice. We couldn't find the place we usually buy from.
Every puasa we will go to some buka puasa buffet and a must go was always to Felda D'Saji's at Dewan Perdana but this is the first year that we didn't go. We didn't even go to any places with buffet because we just didn't eat much this Ramadhan. This was a major difference between this Ramadhan and the previous ones. We didn't eat much because we couldn't. Somehow food just goes to waste if we buy too much.

I lost 3kg. (But gained all that back now!Boohoo)

Preparation for raya was also very minimal. In fact, I only made few bajus for KupuKupu for my kids. I didn't buy or make any for myself. My raya outfit was actually from last year's baju that I made but didn't get to wear. It was da bomb tho. I loved it.

I bought few types of kuih raya this year from the usual place. That was it.

I also ordered these flowers and my oh my…it was so expensive I dont know why I ordered it. But yeah, they made my home look prettier for sure.
Does this make you want to shoot yourself? I do when I think back about the junks we have

In terms of prep for the house for raya. We did ZERO. My maid, knowing that raya is approaching did not even offer to spring clean the house. I did throw away a lot of my kid's toys before raya because their play area was so messy. We cleaned it up all day and finally, it looks ok. Let's hope it remains ok for a long time.

I did give some zakat this year too which I am very happy about. Not as much as last year or the year before but Alhamdulillah, I still got to give some this year.

Basically our Ramadhan was ok. I was hoping it to be easier with a muslim maid around but turns out, I am better off with a non muslim maid! But whatever it is, Allah made it easy and fast this ramadhan. Syukur Alhamdulillah.

Last but not least…..
Can you freaking believe this? LOL. I saw online that they were restocking and my husband was in BSC that day so I told him to get it for me. I said dont worry, I can sell it for higher price if I wanted to and it won't be a waste and he agreed. Of course I didn't sell it. I just wanted to have it. Just to fit in. They're nice. Someday I can wear it.

Hope we will get to see Ramadhan again next year and improve ourselves and be better. InsyaAllah.

Tuesday, July 19, 2016

Partyholic's party

Remember this post? Well, my daughter won the battle. She will be having a party this year and I couldn't be happier for her.

Here was how it went down...

She kept talking about her party when we have clearly mentioned to her that she will not be having one. I am laughing inside but I'm sure, my husband was just scratching his head thinking how to disappoint his precious daugher and how to get away from this mess. Unfortunately, she won! 

One day, her father was about to go for prayers, and she wouldn't let him past through. She put her hands on the wall and he couldn't go past her to get to the toilet to take wuduk. She wouldn't let him go until he agreed to throw her a party. Magrib was almost over so he had no choice but to say OK. She jumped with joy.

It was literally 1 week before the party date and we still haven't booked anywhere. Finally, we decided to have it at JungleGym Bangsar, simply because she wants to roller-skate (or was it rollerblade?) and that is the only place I know that has them. She's been going there for 3x and surprisingly she is really good too.

We booked the party exactly a week before the party. Sent out the invites to her classmates and I had to do so much for the party. Her actual birthday was on Wednesday and the party was on Saturday. I quickly called my cake lady and thank God she was ok to take my order. Sorted out party packs and that was it. Decided to give away few items and just worked on there. To top the stress of preparing party packs, ordering cake and organising things, we also had final exams to study for the following week. It was crazy. I needed to make sure my daughter is well prepared for exams but all she could think of was her party. I mean, who can blame her, right? Exams are so overrated!

We also decided to throw her a little surprise at home on her actual birthday. She's a very lucky girl. She got 2 birthdays!!!! I can see me in her. I love parties. (my own party)
On her birthday, we decorated her room with some party stuff on the walls and whatnot. We went to buy some balloons and ordered a nice cake too. The cake was mainly for me.

Our party was a simple one because I didn't bother doing much. I mean, I figured kids wouldn't give a toss about decorations and they'll be too busy to play anyway. What's important was the cake, the party pack and that was it.

Around 40 kids came to the party. It was just a small one. JungleGym BSC was really helpful and there was staff on site to help us set up and whatnot. Dont forget I didn't have a maid too so I was running around like headless chicken that Saturday. But Alhamdulillah, we got help from one of my husband's ex employee to help us carry things, load and unload. He was really helpful too, Alhamdulillah.

At the party, I really didn't get to chitchat much with the guests at all. I invited some friends but didn't get the chance to hang out at all. I was just busy doing God-knows-what. Running here to greet guests, run inside the playground to look for kids, run back to get party packs, run back to get food, I was really tired!!! We didn't even hire a photographer because it was such a small party so I had to run around inside the playground to snap some photos.

After the party ended, I was so tired I just had to go home. We had a lot of leftovers from the party. We just had that for dinner. Then came the exciting part. The opening of presents!!!
We had so many presents and they were all really wonderful. This is the best part because the kids just love ripping paper off and see what was inside.

My mum promised to get my daughter high heel shoes but she couldn't make it for the party because a relative from Johor came over unannounced and she had to entertain them. She missed the party but my daughter kept bugging her to bring over the heels. She had all the presents in the world but she wanted high heels from grandma and grandma just couldn't make it that day. She started crying. But finally she accepted it and enjoyed opening the other gifts.

Overall it was a good party and she had a good week. She is loved by so many people and she's a lucky girl. She got lots of nice toys from her friends.

Well, I'm glad that party is over because the following week… is stress stress stress…

My daughter is 6 years old, ya'll.

I can't believe she's already 6! I love her to bits and I want nothing but the best for her.

Sunday, July 17, 2016


I hate to complain about maids because I always thought that if you are a good employer, you treat them ok, give them enough food, don't overwork them.. They will be good to you. I am naive and stupid like that. Whenever I hear about maids running away, I always feel like there's a reason. If an employer is nice and good, why would they run? I guess I am super naive and stupid.

This time, it is my turn with this problem. My series of having good maids have ended and I guess sooner or later bad luck will come. This is my turn now and I want to slap and punch someone!

For days I was so angry. Angry at the fact that A MAID can demand attention from employer. A MAID has so much power that we as employer cannot be choosy anymore. We pay so much and yet we are at their freaking mercy. WTH is that about!!!!

When we went for the "counselling" at the agency, she kept on saying about how unhappy she was with ME! First I was angry and wanted to punch her face…but then after it all ended I started doubting myself as a person. I didn't sleep well that night I sent her back because I felt like I wasn't being a nice enough person for her to stay. I cried that night as I was complaining to my mum about what happened.

Yes, I am not friendly.
Yes, I can be a bitch.
Yes, I shout a lot at home (to my kids only).
Yes, I dont chit chat.
Yes, I dont answer her when she says good morning (only that 1 day she said good morning)
Yes, I didn't reply when she said thank you for buying her baju raya and for allowing her to call home 3x in 1 month (although she was only supposed to call home 1x a month)
Yes, I dont talk to her all day (unless it is to give her instructions to do something)
Yes, I scolded her a few times (for not doing her job right)

If that makes me a bad person then what can I say?

It's been a week since she left and surprisingly things have been ok. Im not doing much cleaning because it's not important. What is important is the kids are well fed, clean and safe. So far we have done quite well managing without maid. Yes, it is easier with a maid around and I wish I have a good maid to help me out but this is all I have.

Issue now is…

We paid RM17,000 and will have to pay RM2,000 more to get a replacement and wait 4 months for a new one to come. If she comes and she is just as bad as the first one, again, we need to fork out another RM2,000 and that will continue until we find a good one. My problem is, I dont know if I trust this agency because I had someone who msg'ed me from some maid group telling me pretty much same story as mine and she was using the same agency. I wonder if this is how they do things. You know, agency will always make money when a maid runs away. Employer will always rugi.

I am starting to feel like just getting someone to take over my contract. Pay me some reimbursement and take over the contract and the maid. I dont need to find a replacement and just get a part timer to come every few days.

Doesn't help that my husband and I are not exactly on the same page. Of course I get where he's coming from since he is the pay master and it is not cheap. RM17,000 is a lot of money. It is my kids school fees for 1 term you know!

Im so stressed out and ANGRY. 
Thursday, July 14, 2016

Maid Issues

I've never had maid problems before. I think everyone will have to go through this at some point because finding a good maid is like finding gold. More often than not, you have no choice but to stick to the one you have. I was lucky that our first 2 maids were alright. They never gave me any heartache or headache. I'm sure I was annoyed with them at some point and visa versa but we made it work. I dont think I am a hard employer to please. In fact, I think I am very easy to please. Just-do-your-work-and-get-out-of-my-face type. As long as your work is not TOO bad and doesn't hurt my eyes, I am ok. In fact, I close one eye A LOT which sometimes pisses my husband because I am too laid-back.

This is my first Indon maid. Her salary is slightly higher than the normal Indon maids because she has 7 years work experience working in the Middle East. I specifically asked for someone with experience because a blur maid will piss me off and I am a BAD teacher. First of all, everyone knows how to do housework better than me. How can I teach you how to clean if I am bad at it, right? My weakness is communication. I dont like to chitchat. I'm not the kind of employer who will talk and talk and just share stories. I dont have time. I got lots of things to do and I am not shaking leg at home.

First week she came, I was annoyed at her because she seems super blur. Hello, I thought you had experience? Shouldn't you be more efficient? Read about her first 3 weeks here. I close one eye and let her work slow and steady and I dont comment much. Meantime, I hear stuff from my daughter about what she's been saying. Read about it here. Apparently, I dont like her and she dont like me! During the raya, I also heard from my mother in law's maid that my maid said that the agent did not inform her that there will be young kids and she needed to look after kids. She said she wanted to go back to the agency not long after that. I was furious!!!!!!!

We had to wait a few days before sending her because the agency was still closed for raya. During this few days she kept saying that I dont like her. She told my husband that she can go back to the agency if ma'am dont like her. See how she twisted the story?

First it was she misses her son.
Then she denied talking to my mother in law's maid and said that maid (who is also Indon) misunderstood her. BTW that maid has been with my mother in law for over 20 years.
Then she said she wasn't informed that she has to take care of children.
Finally, it is because maam dont like her.


When she stood there explaining how I dont like her to my husband, in front of my face, I wanted to slap her. Really!!! With her sad sorry face, asking for pity. Oh poor girl, bullied by her employer it seems.

Few days felt like an eternity. From then on she stopped doing anything kids related. We showered the kids, we fed them, we change them. I didn't allow the kids to ask her for anything. She didn't mind it anyway. She was happily ironing. She didn't even vacuum the house and mop the floor.

Finally, we dropped her at the agency on Thursday. It was supposed to be a counselling session but she packed her bag and I guess planning not to come back. I didn't mind. I was super annoyed anyway. Get out of my house! I dont want to see your pity face anymore.

At the agency, the counselling was done really well. It was like confrontation. She has to say it all in front of us and visa versa. What she said about us (me in particular) was quite shocking to me. It was so shocking that I am not just angry, I am annoyed and irritated to the core. Basically, she told the agent that she has no problem doing the job (even looking after kids) but her problem is language. She cannot communicate and cannot understand. Which is a lie because she communicated fine with my kids. She also said that I dont talk to her enough. In fact, I dont talk to her at all. (Why is this a problem?? I didn't hire you to talk to me. I hired you to do your job and talking to you isn't my job!)She went on and on and on about how I dislike her. I have not told her my dissatisfaction about her work so I dont know where she got this "ma'am dont like me" idea. She even said that she is scared of me. Did I beat her up? No. Did I scold her? No. So why is she scared of me? Well, if you ask me….that's not my problem!
What I couldn't stand was she even said that she didn't fast on certain days because she was tired from housework (well, she did not get up for sahur once! I prepared all our food and drinks for sahur for the whole month!) and she said she was scared to even eat bread during her non fasting days because I might scold her. She said she doesn't cook because she is scared. She doesn't eat because she is scared.
I have repeatedly told her to take whatever she wanted to eat, cook whatever you want to cook because she shouldn't rely on me to make food for her to eat. I cook for my family. If there's extra food, sure by all means, take it and finish it. But if there's not enough, please cook yourself. And trust me, throughout the whole time she was with us, I made sure I cooked extra food. Most days, she will finish them all. So dont bullshit me and say you are too scared to eat!!! I also told her to eat at the dining table instead of her room, which she said no and she feels more comfortable eating in her room. Suits yourself!

I am angry beyond words.

The agent did scolded her a few times and told her:
1. Not to be too emotional. You are hired to do a job. Do it. You are not hired to chit chat with ma'am.
2. Do you create gossip. Dont talk to my daughter and spread gossip "I dont like mummy too" or talk to mother in law's maid. All these are gossips and from 1 word you speak will be 5 words back to employer.
3. Do not say agent didn't tell you about taking care of children. She showed us the JD with all the job and task you are supposed to do.
4. Accept Maam's behaviour (WTF, like I have a problem with my behaviour or something?!)

We were old to "rest" for 2 days and think about things. Whether we want to give her another chance or totally reject her. I was ready to reject her because I cannot stand her trying to twist everything and blame it on me.

"Mr (my husband) sangat baik. Tapi maam tidak. Dia tidak suka sama saya. Dia tidak komunikasi sama saya terus. Bila saya cakap selamat pagi, dia tidak jawap. Bila saya cakap terima kasih dia juga tidak jawap"

What are you trying to say????

You know what? I get it….

You work abroad. You are homesick and your employer is a cold hearted bitch. Yea I know. I am like that. I dont talk much. I give instructions, just do it and be gone. I dont have small chats. I will ask the basic stuff like your family background and that's it. I dont ask..oh selamat pagi, tidur selesa ke semalam? Byk mimpi indah ke? Dah makan? Makanan apa kamu suka…? Nanti saya masakkan untuk kamu. Selamat Malam. Semoga dapat mimpi yang indah. 


OK enough about her! She's gone and out!!!! Bye bye! I wish I will find a better maid and she will find a better employer. The End.

Now what???

I've already paid over RM17,000.

Now I got to pay another RM2,200 to get a replacement. My husband is not happy about that at all. That's close to RM20,000 just for a bloody maid. What if the next one is still just as bad or worse??? Pay another RM2,200 until we find the perfect one.

On top of all that. I now have to wait 4 months for them to process everything. We need to change the visa on my maid's passport to a different name (new employer) and then the process of getting a new one over will take another 3 months. 4 months of being maidless?


Monday, July 11, 2016

How to clean training shoes

I've been eating lots of raya food and I've gained all the weight I lost during ramadhan. How frustrating is that??? For the first time ever, my weight was the ideal weight during the fasting month but now, only after a week of raya food, I am back where I started!

No choice, I got to start eating clean again and maybe start exercising. (Something you know I dont do and haven't done in a while!). But it is time to take out my exercise gear (need to look for it) and take out my sport shoes! Where is it??! LOL

If you know me, you will know that I dont own more than 1 or 2 pairs of short shoes. I bought them years ago when my husband and I decided to go to the gym. I wore it a couple of times and that was it. We failed miserably after a few attempts at the gym. That particular shoes has been in the cabinet for ages. I wore it once in Osaka because we had to walk a lot on that trip and it was cold. It is a good pair of shoes! I need to clean it first before wearing them again.

I found the shoes and my oh my, it needs some loving and cleaning for sure. I dont know how to clean them. Unlike my husband, who will just send his shoes for cleaning at BSC, I think I will just do it myself. I did some research and here is what I got. Let me share this with you because I think, like me, you need to start working out too! (You have been eating a lot of ketupat and rendang too, right?)

Here's what I found out…

Many are still not aware that the process of cleaning or washing sport shoes.It is not the same as 
washing normal shoes. This is because, training shoes are made of a special material and washing it 
the wrong way can cause these shoes to be damaged and less durable. Therefore, here are some of 
the things you need to do to clean your training shoes: 

  • First, loosen the strap and keep it separate from the shoe. 
  • Soak the shoes and shoelaces into the cold water.
  • Use a little detergent and never use bleach or fabric softener. 
  • Take unused toothbrush and brush the soles of the shoes soiled. Never use a hard wire brush.
  • For stains that are exposed on the fabric, take a cloth that has been moistened and rubbed it. Do not use an iron wire to brush this. 
  • Next, rinse shoes with clean water and dry in the sun. 
  • Avoid hanging on the shoes with clothes peg.
  • As for the shoelaces, you can brush it so that clean and dry as usual.
There you go! Get them shoes cleaned and let's start eating clean. I'm going to start my juice diet soon. Come and join me!!!
Sunday, July 10, 2016

Raya story

It is already the 4th day of Raya and I hope it is not too late to wish all my blog readers a Selamat Hari Raya, Maaf Zahir Batin. I hope everyone is enjoying their Raya celebration with loved ones. 

I've been so busy. I haven't even had time to blog. I blame myself for being so busy this time around because I think I didn't plan well enough this year. I thought I did but I didn't.

I waited super last minute (2 days before Raya) to actually go to the bank to sort out duit Raya and failed! This is the first Raya that I didn't manage to withdraw money to give duit Raya. Both occasions when I wanted to withdraw money for Raya, system was down. I was unable to take out money for duit Raya! Luckily I had some cash at home. Although not enough to give away, I managed to give some and "hutang" some! "I give you duit Raya next week ok?" to some family members like to my mum! Yikessss 

I waited till raya eve to do my nails too. Luckily I still had time to go. It was full but I managed to get an appointment. I also waited super last minute to buy Baju Raya for my maid. On Raya eve, my husband drove me to Jalan TAR and we managed to buy 1 Baju Raya for her. It was touch and go. I didn't even get to browse and really walk around because we stopped by Jalan TAR on the way to send kids for haircut in Bangsar and pick up Rendang in Subang. It was rush rush rush! 

We managed to rush to Bangsar to get kids their raya haircut. It was such a last minute plan because on the way to pick up our rendangs from Subang, my son complained to say that his hair is itching his ears. A sign that he needed a haircut. We didn't even notice before this! My daughter is keeping her hair long but I managed to convince her to get a trim. It was not easy. She wasn't happy but she looked neater with her hair slightly shorter.

Raya was good. I made an effort to put on makeup (which I usually can't be bothered to) and I must say, it made a huge difference. I wish I can put on makeup daily but I don't have the energy. It was good playing dress up the first 3 days of Raya. 

I didn't get any new Baju Raya this year for myself because I had a Baju Raya that I made last year and didn't get to wear. I wore that this year.Luckily it still fits perfectly. For my kids, I made 1 each to match my first day Baju Raya and another piece of whatever colours they wanted. My husband didn't get new Baju too. He wore whatever he had to match ours. 

On second day of Raya, the kids wore their favourite piece. My daughter wore a pink kupukupu Baju Kurung and my son wanted a green Baju melayu, also from Kupukupu (obviously). They were in them pretty much the whole day. Running around with their cousins, we went visiting and they were so comfortable all day. That's why I love my baju kurungs from KupuKupu. Our fabric is so soft and comfortable for kids to be in them all day.

We spent time with family and on the second day, we went to my friend's open house. Over 20 years of friendship with this particular friend. We managed to chit chat for quite some time because by the time we arrived, all her guests had already left. We got full attention. Kids was busy playing with her kids too. 

We also managed to buy some bunga api from Kampung Baru. Kids experienced their first "pop pop" and loved it. They loved it so much that we had to go back again the next day to get more. 

Overall it was a good Raya. Tiring but it was good.

By the third day of raya we were all sick of rendangs. We went out to Bangsar Village to get our Thai food fix. Thai food never tasted so good!

Raya holiday is officially over now. My daughter is back in school this morning. I couldn't sleep well last night for some reason. I have so much going on right now. I'll share in a different post. My daughter's birthday is coming up this week and she begged us for a birthday party. It was a last minute thing because my husband only agreed to it few days ago. Party is this weekend. I'm not going to do much but still, bits and pieces to do to prepare for it. 

I'm so tired!!! To top that, my daughter's final year exam is coming up next week too. A lot of revision work to do which we haven't done, obviously. And to top all this, my maid is doing my head in.
Welcome to the world of indon maids I was told. 

Whatever it is, I hope everyone is having a good raya and had a good first day raya celebration. 
I want to wish all my readers a Selamat Hari Raya. Maaf Zahir Batin.

Enjoy the rest of the month!!! Busy month for me…. 
Sunday, July 3, 2016

Holiday Options

Our school term is ending soon. How time flies. I cannot believe come end of August, my daughter will be in Year 2. Feels like it was just yesterday when she was still crying each time I drop her off in school.

This one year in school has been quite a roller coaster ride for us.

- exams is clearly not bothering her at all because she doesn't fully understand the concept yet but it is stressing me out. I can't help it. I keep telling myself that it is only exams, big freaking deal.. So what if she doesn't do well but for some weird reason, I still want her to do well and study and whatnot. I guess I am a tiger mummy after all.
- she is learning so many things in school and some of it, aren't so good. Like the languages they speak and how they talk with friends. I had to punish her a few times for saying negative words. She gets it now. 
- she is having a major mental block for Maths because the teacher is very old school and too strict. It is so bad that even things like 1+1+1 she won't do. 

Apart from all that, school is awesome. She is so much more matured and overall such a happy kid. She's doing quite well in most of her subjects and even mandarin. She always gets full marks for mandarin and she loves it!
Her BM? Hmmm... Not so much.

So since it is already end of term, we need to start thinking about our year end holiday. 

I gave them 3 options...

1. Beach / island holiday. For selfish reasons, I suggested Maldives. But hubs said it is quite dangerous swimming in open water for them. (It is only knee length) but fishes everywhere and even stingray. I almost kena when I was there the last time. But still.. I love Maldives.
Or we can do Thailand. Phuket, Krabi or even Bali. Anywhere with sun and beach is good for me. Kids will love being in the water 24 Hours and will come back black. So what!

2. Disneyland. I am thinking of going to the new Disneyland in Shanghai. I'm not a fan of going China but Shanghai perhaps is not too bad? Or Hong Kong? Or Maybe Tokyo. Kids love seeing all the characters. We didn't see any when we were in Paris 2 years ago, tho. 

3. Ski holiday. Snow!
I've never been on a skiing trip. I don't mind trying although I'm not a fan of cold. My kids would love it. I don't mind going to Niseko because I heard really good things about that place and I want to check it out.

I asked both my kids where they would want to go.. Only 3 options and guess what they picked?

Hints: they both want different things and different places.